Thank you

I've become a mother

And a father, to myself

I have a baby to take care of

And that's me

I feed myself, and bathe me

and put me to bed at night

ready for school in the morning

I hope I will do good, and well!

Time will tell

I am pregnant

With another me

To be born soon

Such responsibility!

How will I take care

Of all my future mouths to feed

How can I be sure

To help myself, when I'm in need?

Time will tell

For now, I just know

Work, work, work

be good, take care

Say Thank You, Please

We all have many mouths to feed

This brain I wear
This heart I carry
Are, to me a wild catastrophe
If they worry you
(They may try!)
Well then, I am sorry

This heart, these visceral guts of mine
Fill me with tears, and laughter, and tears
Floating this wild, balooning mind
Not quite contained between my ears
What can I do, but ride out my time
Holding on tight, throughout the years
Except now I guess I can "get online"
And complain far and wide about my fears
-
I'm afraid, yes, afraid, that this heart of mine
Won't make it, through all these wild years
To share, with our newborn mind
Something great, pleasing to Everyone's ears
All of the forces of change combined
Are focused on all of our "nows" and "heres"
A storm-tossed fleet on an ocean of time
Are we, lost child bucaneers
-
No simple ocean we now ride
Merely affected by wind and tide
The warmth of the sun, its cold absence aside
We're sensitive to many tides
The Earth spins wild, orbits wide
Burned by sun and stars besides
Pitted by far-flung stones and ice
Pressed enough to melt inside
Yanked through space
At a frightening pace
By a Galaxy of modest size
In which a million suns could hide
And never be noticed by our two eyes
As we hang on for the ride of our lives

And that's nothing compared to the ways we affect each other...

I hope you atheists can forgive my religious tendencies...
I hope that you religious folk forgive my godless upbringing
We are all the same
We are all the same

How can I have peace?
I will have it
Even if my heart is hard
And I must say
That I don't care
For some, or others
This is something
Which I do not like to say

My brother says
God is worthless
My other brother says
Your brother is worthless
Both are bad

Beware extremes!
Don't pick a team
Stay here, in the middle
Time will tell
Just who chose well
And whose world-view was little

Do you know everything
Do you speak with authority
Let's be careful
With our words
Lest we speak of more than we
Could know

Let's agree, that some things be
And some things, they be not
And some things seem to be but aren't
And some things seem to not, but do
And that's about as simple as it comes

Welcome to life
Here's your ignorance
Try not to hurt yourself with it

Gene Travels

I'm preparing for a trip. I've informed the house in which I've lived the last four years that I'll soon depart, intending to go live with family. I'm still in it at the moment, though... it's a bit awkward. My friends and family ask: "Gene, what's your plan?"

I consider my plan, my employment, my methods of living my life, and I wonder... Life sure is confusing sometimes. Blessed be those who feel like they know their purpose!

It occurs to me that I am free, anything to pursue. I'm pining a bit, for family, for a reliable lifestyle that involves early bed, early rising, and tidiness. It is easy for me, lately, to be involved in a crowd that wants to stay up late and party all the time. Hopefully I'll soon be headed toward home, to visit my father and mother. Hopefully my old friends will forgive me, for getting to old and careworn to stay up late into the night with them.

Well, we are all getting older... Imagine how God feels!

Before we get too carried away...

Let's take a little time to say
That the purpose of this bloggerey
Is just to put us all "on the same page"
A mind is a terrible thing not to display

There is quite enough disorder in our lives
At least, it seems that way to me, sometimes
I'd rather work together, organized
I'll start by showing off my own mind's eye

I've seen reality now, over time
Just like you, don't we all wonder why
Why the world itself is going wild
Can't I make life right for me and mine
Without making it worse for someones child

As a man, who is a man, I do take care
There are many different people here
Some are strong, and others weak
Some are large, and some petite

Open your eyes, as a first try
In the past you would have spied
Just only what around you lies
But these days, no, the world's increased in size

Look at your country!
It's as large as the Earth!
Beautiful, dangerous, confusing, and worth
All of your efforts, your time,
You owe it your birth

Here you sit, or stand, in your home
You may freely in it roam
You'll find, everywhere you go
Siblings, parents, children, home

Don't forget, you're never alone
The loneliness you feel is not your own
But the Lord's, and not yours, not your own
The loneliness you feel is not your own

Metagene

Gene went to a university to study Fine Art, but failed to graduate. Sometimes he feels like he doesn't need no degree or nuthin, sometimes he wishes he had been more determined. He wished at that time that he could study "crude art" instead...

Gene likes to be pious, but does not have a native religion.

He likes to eat vegetarian food, but sometimes eats meat.

He likes to avoid pork for the Muslims, and beef for the Hindus, but sometimes eats these things.

Gene likes to pray to God.

His favorite religions are Taoism, Buddhism, Christianity, Islam.

Gene does not like marijuana, though he has tried it.

Gene sometimes drinks alcohol, but concedes that it's probably not a very good idea.

Gene is willing to work very hard for his success.

Gene has worked jobs which require staying awake all night.

Gene has occasionally worked all day, all night, and the next day as well. This didn't seem very healthy...

Gene was born and raised in the "USA," but prefers to say that he's from the Internet.

Gene has traveled to Japan, Canada, England, France, and Germany, and hopes to see China after learning to read and speak Mandarin and/or Cantonese.

Gene is learning to speak French.

Metastuff

Gene is in the process of uploading his brain on to the internet. This may take some time.

Meanwhile he/I(him) will do our best to give clues as to why this process is necessary by providing metadata about this guy whose blog you are reading.

First: Gene's a nice guy. Usually. You're more likely to see him trying to be helpful, useful, pious, filial, and a gentleman than trying to fit in with a rough crowd, or to do anything destructive. So, if it should have any bearing on your desire to read/participate in this project, let it be known that my goals include only "good" things, and exclude "bad" ones.

Second: My/Our/His thoughts, like all of ours, buzz like electrons around any given subject of consideration, and connect constantly with the many ideas or concepts associated with any given subject which he/I may be thinking/speaking/writing about. Gene thinks that these "meta"concepts ("metaconcepts?") deserve more attention in daily conversation, and will try daily to illuminate the network of nested relationships of the conceptual facts of which our reality is made. It seems to me that the world we live in, though often painful, distressing, confusing, lonely, is actually perfectly reasonable and totally good. Sure, shit happens, but not more so than flowers, and love, and family, etc.

The "problem" with our perfect world is that it is perfectly balanced, with just as many "good" things in it as "bad." Thus, when we view it from our less-than-perfect, humbly human eyes, we often see more bad in it than good. What can we do, but grin, and bear it? And cry...

Ach...

I'm not in trouble, I don't suppose...
I sleep well, I wear fine clothes
I go just where the Lord's wind blows.
Long enough of doing so
A man may learn just where to go,
And that's home, to where the heart is.
I have no wife, no kids sprung hence,
No ties, no needs, nor wish for else.
Guess I'll go and check up on my folks...




What have I learned, these long, lonely years?
That striving can't compete with tears.
Tis better to fail, and cry out your heart
Than it is to live unexpressed, sans Art
Though my art, it humble be
Unseen to most but Buddha and me
Yet I'm sure I have Something
Worthy now, toward home to bring,
For Treasure we aren't on Earth keeping,
But in our hearts

Here are my thoughts laid down to see
In hopes of making it plain to thee
Why I lived so long so far and separately
Even though I've sorely missed my family

Myself

Here I am, or here I was
I put this here just because
Because it's good; images help
To make the invisible
Better understood
I'm different now, and the same
In heart, in purpose, and in name